I wrote this back in the 1980s. It was a protest ode for a time and observance of the seemingly raking of endless dollars which helped proffer multi-million dollar department stores; to make their money fast in a political environment that was [at that time] politically volatile and contentious. In other words, something you wrote at uni… (sounds familiar?) And guess-what? Nothing, in principle seems to have changed. (Hey-ho).

We sell Marxist pajamas; Monks, priests and llamas;
Frozen fish fingers; Social climbing clingers.
All the latest in hedonistic books, and some of the world’s greatest crooks.
“No”; we can’t get the Shah or Iran; but we can supply you with a bedside pan.

We have ‘Rosemary’s Baby’; If you ask we’ll say “maybe;”
Do we stock modern day martyrs, or only President Carters?
“I want America’s Hoover Dam. I’ll exchange it for eggs, bacon and Spam”; or free ‘life-style’ passes, and my telescopic field glasses.

Left-wing mosquitoes, and anti-Christ heroes.
Peasants and paupers, All those napalmed daughters.
We cater for all you “friendies”, even those ‘bent-minded trendies’.
Yes, we now do have some speed, but we can’t score any LSD.

Our product was for this week, a broken off budgie’s beak.
For tomorrow it will be all changed; people will become dis-arranged.
On display in little jars, are miniature petrol-driven cars.
Sausages, snags and bangers; and all those multiplying wire coat hangers.

We are out of stock of voodoo dolls; But we have the latest Gallop Polls.
Statistics which are ruthless; photographers are so useless.
We can deliver newspapers to you in bed; But we can’t get the facts to stay in your head.
Harlequins and a transvestite; For Australians we have Vegemite.
Pyramids for your razor blades; we’ll even reconstruct the Pilgrim Crusades.
Paper clothes to throw away, or plastic one’s to use next day.

I’m informing all of you at home, I am no plastic garden gnome.
It all came to me one day in bed, I’m a capitalist, and I want to stay ahead.
I built the world’s worst department store, I wish I could do so much more;
Presumably, one day I will be bought out by an even more pretentious multi-millionaire juggernaut!

• For further examples of my poetic art contributions, visit this page.

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